18:30 - DR. EDMUND BASSETT - A LITTLE HOUSE

[◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊]

Lisa-
"He hasn't been a very good boy, he never was. What does it
really mean to hurt someone? I guess that probably sounds like
I'm dodging the question, and I really am. As for where he will go...
 S̷̨a͟͞͡͝͞t̨͜͜͡h̡̕҉̸a͏͘r̵͜͝͠͝i̸e͏̶l̴͜͟͡ will probably want to spend some time with him first.
Where do you think you will go when you die?"

[∆§Indea§∆]

(Neurotic)

I drank some more wine before I answered.

Edmund-

” Is she here now? Your daughter? What does it mean to spend time with Sathariel? To you.

Well I can’t say I have given it too much thought. Hopefully it won’t be too soon heh. Heh. Ah... As long as I can leave something worth while on earth I won’t mind too much. Oblivion doesn’t sound so terrible. Or somewhere comfortable and pleasant. As long as I think I deserve it right?”

[◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊]

Lisa-
"That's true, you go wherever you think you deserve. But what will you
think you deserve when the time comes? Oblivion though, that's very
interesting. Very easily arranged, too."

[∆§Indea§∆]

(Neurotic)

Edmund-

"WOah Woah there. This is purely hypothetical. HYPO- thetical. Perhaps when I die of old age, like old old age. I honestly don't know, depends on how the rest of all this unfolds right? Life."

I honestly didn't want to think about what I thought I deserved. I knew what I wanted to deserve but the subconscious was an awful beast.

Edmund- (mumbled)

^{"Butcher? Colt?"}

Now. You and your son are both good at avoiding answers. Is it against your religion or something? What is going to happen to Timothy if he's taken back? Exactly. Nothing vague. "

[◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊]

Lisa-
"He'll go past the illusion, to where the rest of us are. This, this room we're in,
 is just a prisoner visitation, with thick glass between us. You're here, but you're not.
I'm here, but I'm not either. The world you live in is unfathomably small compared
 to what is on the other side of the illusion. I'm sure it all sounds vague with this
jargon, but I find it hard to explain otherwise."

[∆§Indea§∆]

(Neurotic)


Edmund-

"That's fine. Are you happy here?"

I took a breath as I asked the question on my lips. I wanted an answer but it terrified me.

Edmund-

"Are you... Is she... confined to this ship? If I make it out, nothing weird will be able to happen to me again, right? It will all be very normal. Can that be arranged?"

[◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊]

She laughed very darkly, turning into a sultry Lauren Bacall character

all of a sudden.

Lisa-
"That, I cannot guarantee. Once you see past the illusion, there's no going back,
I'm afraid. You can't unlearn something, which I'm sure you're aware of, doctor."

[∆§Indea§∆]

(Neurotic)



My bottom lip trembles unbecomingly. My eyes grew misty a I fought back tears. I made love to the wine bottle drinking greedily.How could I do my job and live my life with all this weirdness around me? How would I know anything was real. There had to be a way to deal with it.

Edmund-

"Tell that to my golf buddies. I can ignore it. I can... I can block it out... Or medication. Would medication do it? Hypnotherapy? Surely others have tried? We can't be the first to see this. How do you live your life with all this?"

(Mumbled)

^{"Don't vandal..."}

[◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊]

Lisa-
"There are ways to cope. Have you considered religion? I have a recommendation..."

[∆§Indea§∆]

(Neurotic)

Edmund-

"YOURS??"

I waved my arms about emphatically.

"That's what got us all here in the first place. I'm not about to sacrifice my daughter or some kid. It doesn't seem peaceful here. How would accepting your religion help AT ALL? Is there some kind of ritual to block all this out? If joining means never having to come back here, I'm all in."

I drank more from the bottle as if to accentuate my point.

[◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊]

Lisa-
"Oh you don't have to be an evangelist like me to share beliefs. You could simply think of S̷a͠th̡ar̀iȩl as a sort of totem or guiding figure. Like being a Jungian or a Skinnerian. Your first glimpse through the illusion can be hard, but the more you learn, the more secure you will become. You've surely helped others through existential crises, right?"

[∆§Indea§∆]

(Neurotic)





I out my head in my hands, defeated.

Edmund-

"Yes but.... How can I help anyone like this? I need something. Anything really. You're right, aren't you? You are. Damn. Damn. Okay, what are your beliefs exactly? How would I go about it?"

(mumbled)

^{"Familiar or horrible."}

[◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊]

Lisa-
"We believe in individualism. We are born alone, we will die alone. But after death we may find belonging. Like how people dream of meeting their lost love ones in heaven. Not too objectionable?"

There had to be more to it.

[∆§Indea§∆]

(Neurotic)

Edmund-

"That all sounds very nice but what I have seen doesn’t seem so nice and simple. I am not just looking for the brochure... How does it help me? Are there books to assist in my understanding? How to block out the madness and appear normal for instance. Or at least be in some control! I just want as much of my regular life as possible but if that has to include some of this, I need to know what I am in for."

I tried to hide some of the raw desperation in my voice.

[◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊]

Lisa-
"We'll find you. Be receptive to it when you return. Though now that you are aware, you'll find cracks in the illusion everywhere you go. The more open you are to accepting it, the easier it will be for you. Fighting it is obviously stressful, and futile."