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Post by ◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊ on Jun 3, 2013 0:14:23 GMT -8
Seth- "Um, Dr. Bebe... maybe you can talk with Doctor Ortiz and you can both perform some check ups on the new people? Making the work faster and all that? Since Dr. Ortiz hasn't had a full clinic set up, maybe she wouldn't mind having more tools at her disposal? Perhaps? "
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Jun 3, 2013 0:24:32 GMT -8
Dr. Ortiz wheeled on Seth and pointed at him, lo, with the Finger of Doom. Dr. Ortiz- "Nice try, stretchy, but my people don't need to be inspected, any more than yours do."
Cathleen- "Testy."
Dr. Bebe- "Listen, Dr. Ortiz, there are methods I may have developed of which you are unaware. Perhaps you can think of this as supplemental care."
Dr. Ortiz- "Perhaps you want a supplement of vitamin F."
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Post by ◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊ on Jun 3, 2013 0:29:15 GMT -8
Seth- "I dunno, well... I guess they're going be self-governed, so maybe it's a special case. Dr. Ortiz, are you going to be the official doctor for all the new folks? "
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Jun 3, 2013 0:44:34 GMT -8
Dr. Ortiz started to throw more sass and was interrupted by Dr. Bebe. Dr. Bebe- "I don't think people will accept that all available tests were not done on the new population. Dr. Ortiz, if you agree to conduct the tests, I will let you know about my new methodology. I'm testing for things that can be missed with the usual methods."
Dr. Ortiz- "Hmm... OK, but only if your secret methodology isn't stupid fucking bullshit."
Dr. Bebe- "You might find it to be stupid fucking bullshit, but hopefully you will also find it amusing. Shall we?" Dr. Bebe led Dr. Ortiz into the next room. Wil- "Jeez that was tense."
Phil- "Who's to say it should have stopped being tense?"
Columbo- "Maybe you could use a muscle relaxant, buddy."
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Post by ◊◊BLOODBEASTER◊◊ on Jun 3, 2013 0:50:50 GMT -8
Seth- "Maybe after this, we can set up a new clinic for 320. I'm sure Dr. Bebe will appreciate a lighter workload. "
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Jun 3, 2013 1:06:50 GMT -8
Columbo- "Let's hope Dr. O is a proctologist, because that's going to be the asshole clinic."
Phil- "Oh Ho ho ho ho..." He sounded distinctly like Jabba the Hutt.
Cathleen- "One, that's my building. Two, what's with all the ass jokes today? I thought you weren't even into that."
Wil- "Yikes! This is the TMI clinic, huh?"
Seth- "I thought so too until I went some of these other enclaves... "
Phil- "Ha ha ha... Yes... things have gotten a little strange betwixt us, haven't they?"
Cathleen- "I have no idea what you're talking about. Don't listen to them, Wil."
Wil- "Don't worry. I'd rather not."
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Jun 3, 2013 1:24:03 GMT -8
The doctors returned, with Ortiz sweeping up her coterie and heading toward the door. Dr. Ortiz- "Have fun playing doctor, peoples."
Dr. Bebe- "Likewise! Don't be a stranger!" Dr. Ortiz and Phil left, followed quickly by Wil and Seth. Columbo- "Those guys really have their sheet together, you know what I'm saying?"
Cathleen- "..."
Dr. Bebe- "I agree, actually. Dr. Ortiz seems unusually clinical for a GP. That I can get behind."
Cathleen- "Dr. Bebe, if Nurse Columbo says something stupid about 'behinds,' can I discipline him?"
Dr. Bebe- "Absolutely."
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Sept 1, 2013 3:37:11 GMT -8
Some time and many events later, Columbo was sweeping up the last of the bashed skeletons off the floor. Columbo- "Jesus. What a load that was."
Dr. Bebe- "Whistle while you work, Nurse Columbo."
Columbo- "..."
Cathleen- "So... Do you mind if I repeat myself from, like, forever?"
Dr. Bebe- "Hm?"
Cathleen- "Why do we have to keep all the undead junk down here. It doesn't seem hygienic or safe."
Dr. Bebe- "Nonsense. We know it's hygienic because we do the cleaning ourselves. At any rate, perhaps it's time to --" A stretchy Seth appeared. Dr. Bebe- "Hello, Mr. President. Looking good today. Any irritation on your skeleton scratches?"
Seth- "Oh no, not really. Skeletons probably aren't that germ-y are they? Be like getting poked with a pencil or whatever."
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Sept 8, 2013 1:49:17 GMT -8
Cathleen- "Good morning."
Dr. Bebe- "Well, we put antiseptic on it for a reason, but I'm glad you're well. What brings you to the clinic?" Seth saw that someone was out in the main restaurant area, through the open doors. Seth- "I was just curious what the status of the uh... head... was. I mean I'm not expecting it to start singing showtunes or anything but..."
Jordan- "If you're blue and you don't know where to go to, Why doncha go where mummies sit? Puttin' on the Ritz." A wily satanic overlord appeared. Seth- "Oh hey Jordan, are you keeping our prized relic company?"
Jordan- "No, Kyle is. But after seeing one of my more spectacular failures, he got the impression I'm a magic genius. I was just paying a visit to shrug my shoulders in a useless way."
Cathleen- "Don't be so hard on yourself."
Columbo- "Nyeh nyes snyo hard on ooself, Weeee."
Seth- "Well shall we both get to shrugging? I'm too curious to see that grody thing."
Jordan- "..." Bebe, Jordan, and Seth left Cathleen and Columbo behind, going out into the restaurant area to find Kyle sitting in a high stool, an arm leaned against a counter, the hand in his hair. He turned to acknowledge them. Kyle- "Oh, hey dudes."
Seth- "Hey Kyle, what's the word? We figure out how to make a Ultimate Sword of Mummyslaying yet?"
Kyle- "Apparently Patti with a nine is good enough for that shit. But I haven't figured out anything."
Jordan- "Ganbatte, kudasai. It's not like there's a Mummies for Dummies book in the library."
Dr. Bebe- "I did a bit of examination. There's signs of embalming, enough residue to suggest they didn't bother removing most of the organs ... No microscopic cell activity. It just looks like a beat-up piece of dead guy, to our science."
Seth- "Bleh, I hope fishing that thing outta the pool was worth it. So if this thing isn't useful scientifically, how about the other end of things? Can we make this thing into a magic item or somethin'?"
Kyle- "It's hella grody, but you can make it into something, like, say, a mask, or a bag. As for magic... It's all new. I mean, there's nothing in any book I've seen that would help. I'd really be making something up and hoping for the best, although...
I remember seeing some books of magic that mention using mummy parts as ingredients. It was usually a hand or something else, and I doubt it was for any effect we really want. How about you Jordan?"
Jordan- "I have to admit, I just came by to encourage you. I'm no more qualified to do anything there than you. In fact, I'm probably worse off for not having the stomach for ickiness. You're great, Kyle."
Kyle- "Uh... thanks?"
Seth- "For real, I'm glad I only had to look at that thing in a dark swimming pool. Hey maybe we could make it into a shrunken head or something? Or make it into a little doll, nothing could go wrong there right?"
Dr. Bebe- "You'd have to ask Richard Matheson about that one, Seth. Meanwhile, I'll take my leave."
Jordan- "Likewise. Keep up the good fight, my friend. Hail Satan."
Kyle- "Hail Satan." Dr. Bebe and Jordan left the last two fellows alone in the room. They could hear soft conversation from the clinic. Sun beamed in through a high, uncovered spot on the plexiglass. Kyle- "What does a head mean, dude?"
Seth- "Like, symbolically? Ooh let me use my skills as an English major-- the head symbolizes our persona, our face, how we interact with the world, to own this head is to own the mummy himself, his soul to be vulgar about it. Of course, I don't even know if he's still got a brain in there so I dunno what that means."
Kyle- "Yeah... Symbolically. Magic has a lot to do with symbols. If you're gonna try to invent new magic, think of associations. There's more obvious, like, symbol symbols - pictograms and stuff. Then there's animal associations, like doves with purity or jesus crap. Anyway, what is a head for? The celts thought that's where the soul is, but they used skulls for that stuff, and his skull is a mess."
Seth- "Yeah didn't the Egyptians just throw the brains out? Well, I guess the face is pretty important, that's how we communicate. Weren't there some mummies where they stretched the skin over pieces of wood or something?"
Kyle- "Reading your National Geographics since the shit went down? That's more homework than I've done on the dudes. What do you remember about old-time mummies? Especially Egyptian ones, because the names say that's the tradition they are going with."
Seth- "Mm I get them mixed up with each other, those History Channel specials all run together. I think they took out all the organs and put them in special jars, and used herbs and junk to stuff the body and something something, however they embalmed them. They wrapped them in linen and put 'em in their sarcophagus and it usually had a portrait of some kind of their face. But how is it different if you do it to yourself? Did they do it all together or send out like, a Wiki?"
Kyle- "I was talking about it with Ben and Stevie. When they fucked up the world, they fucked up traffic. If they aren't close by each other now - and we know some aren't - then they couldn't have easily helped each other go mummy. So they had help from some other kind of freak - humans, or maybe demon dead. So they turn into mummies. Why? What does that do for them? They must have had some power before to get help turning into mummies and all that other shit, so that isn't where their powers come from. But maybe it made them more powerful - so they could do the big spell. I dunno."
Seth- "They probably thought it'd make 'em live forever. This guy was all sloppy and nasty before Patti got to him, so seems like that wasn't working great. Maybe it helps them get street cred with blood guys."
Kyle- "Hehe. You're right. Shit, it's weird... I mean, I hear some por-- um, guys are smarter than their day jobs, ya know? Like, um... Anyway, we really don't know enough to make guessing worth it, so back to the head thing."
Seth- "Oh yeah, ugh it was so annoying getting condescended to when I was a bike messenger, I totally know what you mean. So we gonna dry this guy like jerky or is it gonna get funkier than it already is?"
Kyle- "Right now he's in an iron box, but maybe it would be good to get him drying before he gets worse... Yeah." He shook his head. "Guess I'll stop wasting your time. Prez it up, dude."
Seth- "Nah it's cool, this is more interesting than whatever BS I gotta do up there. But I'll go cold kick it on the roof with some booze if I have to, maybe go hit up Jackson about getting some new tats. Hey so have you gotten your youth corrupted yet or is it against your r-- Huh. Uh, --ethics?"
Kyle- "That's a strange question to ask out of nowhere. Uh... In the baseball analogy, which one is an awkward handjob that everyone regrets?"
Seth- "Hahaha I meant about drinking or tattoos, but I feel ya bro."
Kyle- "I don't drink much - sometimes I had to for survival at El Corazon. Like, when we ran out of water and piss wasn't appealing... I just met the tattoo guy recently. Didn't know we could do anything better than prison work. You think I should get ink?"
Seth- "Maybe you can get a cool Satan tattoo. Or a magic tattoo. Do those exist?"
Kyle- "... Um... Y'know, making a Coach bag of the Damned out of his head is pretty sketchy, but ... magic tattoos seem like they'd be real easy. Huh."
Seth- "Hell, I can be a test subject. Got some blank canvas here and even if they don't work, it'll be chic as fuck amirite?"
"... Damn, why not? Testing it out will be tough though. I mean, you don't wanna go out of your way to get jumped by demon dead."
Seth- "Hm, I wonder what we could even do with it... maybe we can just throw the whole book at it and see if anything interesting happens?"
Kyle- "Would you be cool with looking like Sam Neill from 'In the Mouth of Madness' for this?"
Seth- "In a very target area, sure. Why not."
Kyle- "I'm gonna try to get the doctor to tan this head for us, and uh, tonight I'll draw some stuff. Let's go see tattoo guy tomorrow..."
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Sept 9, 2013 15:39:33 GMT -8
Out in the clinic... Cathleen- "Hey. Welcome to the clinic. Who do we have here, Wil?"
Wil- "Just a guy that needs hel--"
Columbo- "Hell no. What the sheet, Derek?"
Dr. Bebe- "... Calm yourself Nurse Columbo."
Derek- "I'm sorry, shit, fuck, I don't wanna..."
Wil- "Aw, no, what's going on? Did I mess up?"
Dr. Bebe- "No Wil, no... Did you administer the demon test?"
Wil- "Yes ma'am." Then Seth walked in from the restaurant area. Seth- "WhuTha..."
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Sept 10, 2013 0:48:11 GMT -8
Cathleen- "Huh? What's the beef?"
Wil- "Aw man, I know I screwed up."
Columbo- "Well, that's it now. Off you go, Mr. Beef."
Dr. Bebe- "Everybody, please!"
Derek- "I wanna talk... S-seth, dude..."
Seth- "Uhhhhhhh..."
Seth was all ♪Nowhere to run to Baybeh, nowhere to hide.♫ Seth- "Well didn't 'spect to see you here. What's uh, what's new?"
Derek- "*a-bluh-blub* I... I'm so sick of running... Living like a dog in those streets... fuckin... People... Always want something. I just need to rest. I just *sob* I need to rest here."
Seth- "Man, just.. don't worry about it. Of course. You should get in there to see Bebe, I'll go tell the folks upstairs and we'll get you somewhere to sleep."
Damn but this shit was weird.
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Sept 10, 2013 1:12:29 GMT -8
And thus it came to pass, that Derek did return! Seth escaped to give the news to Breanne and hopefully find a place to hide where the word wasn't constantly weirding at him.
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Sept 16, 2013 1:38:09 GMT -8
The next day... Columbo- "♪Upside, inside out, livin' la vida loca♫"
Dr. Bebe- "I wish, Nurse Columbo. *siigh* My experiments are stagnating. I need more diverse specimens." Cathleen finished dusting a counter and hopped up on a stool to rest. Cathleen- "Heh, fresh mummy head not good enough for you, Doctor? Seems pretty top shelf to me."
Dr. Bebe- "No... But maybe our metaphysicians can make better use of it. What do you think of working more closely with our men of magic?"
Cathleen- "I guess we could, but what could we do? We're not magicians."
Dr. Bebe- "It's true. As science and modern medicine are based on a presumption of material reality, we are ill equipped to study the immaterial. Perhaps if one of our young wizards produced something material to examine..."
Cathleen- "Heck, why not? It'd be nice if they dried the nasty body parts first next time, but can't win 'em all huh. Do you think they could find something other than that grody ectoplasm blood?"
Columbo- "No, she said the weezards would produce something material, like maybe a magic semen sample, huh?"
Cathleen- "Nas-tee. Well what could we do? I mean if they find something, sure, but until then?" FATE INTERVENED! Lee- "Good morning, neighbors." Fate looked a bit down in the mouth. Cathleen- "Hey, good morning... you. What brings you here today?"
Dr. Bebe- "What happened, Lee?"
Lee- "There's no way to say it easy. Helen's dead."
Dr. Bebe- "Dreadful. I'm so sorry. What can we do for you, then?"
Lee- "... Research. She's ... gone demonic. She's definitely dead and gone, but her body is being a hassle for us. Anyway, creepy Dr. Feingold thinks you'd like to study the demon dead closer, so... Do you?"
Dr. Bebe- "... ... ..."
Lee- "I know, too creepy, right? I'll go back and we'll destroy the-"
Dr. Bebe- "Don't. Nurse Cathleen, do you know any strong young people that can help handle a possessed specimen?"
Cathleen- "A--a living--er, animate one...?! I mean, I guess? Maybe Rafi?"
Dr. Bebe- "Good. Rafi and one more. Don't worry about religiosity, because we will bury the specimen before sundown. Lee, wait here until Nurse Cathleen returns with assistance, and then retrieve the dearly departed for me."
Lee- "Jesus H. I forgot about you. OK..."
Cathleen- "So my part of the job's just gonna be getting the help, right? Right?"
Columbo- "I wouldn't count on it. Heh heh."
Dr. Bebe- "Nurse Columbo, retrieve for me that occultist fellow, 'Nat' Grant..." With that, people sprang into action!
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Sept 16, 2013 3:23:58 GMT -8
A few moments later, Kyle walked through, on his way to ponder the face of evil. Kyle- "'Sup Dr. Bebe. Guy."
Lee- "I'm Lee."
Dr. Bebe- "Good morning Kyle. Oh, do stick around today. We've some business to attend. I'd like to know everything you know about demonic possession and exorcism."
Kyle- "Whoa. Uh, OK." He kept on, going into the front of restaurant area... A few moments after that, someone else arrived. Ione- "Did you miss me, Dr. Bebe?"
Monty- "So... There's this."
Dr. Bebe- "Whoa. Um, welcome back, Ione. Monty, did you...?"
Monty- "She liked Glee."
Ione- "Um, what am I, like, doing here? I'm fine."
Dr. Bebe- "Sorry, Ione, it's a formality. I have to give you a physical exam. Come with me into the exam room. Monty, you can go back to the door. Thank you very much." Bebe led Ione into the front of the restaurant. They walked through thin shafts of light, past Kyle. Kyle- "New blood, huh? Howdy."
Ione- "'No blood?' What? Don't be stupid. I have lots of blood."
Dr. Bebe- "She's returning, Kyle. Don't worry. Ione, it's just around the corner past the curtains, OK?" And so on...
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Post by Thy Dungyeon Maestyr on Sept 16, 2013 4:43:34 GMT -8
When Columbo returned with Nat, the only people present were Dr. Bebe and Kyle. ((Players proceed!))
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